quite a long while ago… | 2 Comments

I wanna be that girl….

I wanna be that girl that…walks only on my tippy toes so that I’m taller than tall and can catch eagles in my hair…I wanna slam into walls to mash up my face and then sew it back up with spiderwebs, spit and sparkles…I wanna be that girl that wears bunny ears made of pantyhose stuffed with mashed potatoes so that when I spin around really fast I create a mashed potato rain storm that can be enjoyed by anyone that is standing next to me with an open mouth…I wanna be that girl that when I hug someone I want them to see floating hearts humping other floating hearts in an intense heart to heart action packed humpety hump with glitter in the sky…I wanna turn into a butterfly and land in peoples ears and tell them secrets about themselves that they don’t even know…I wanna be that girl that has breath that tastes like cinnamon rolls …. but not that fake cinnamon roll taste… the real thing…I wanna morph into bubble wrap and then run around and have giraffes and little monkeys pop all my bubbles while I spin around super fast… I wanna be that girl that eats lightbulbs and disco balls and then everywhere I go I  light up the night…I wanna have all the time in the world to lie in the grass and make art and read stories and smoke cigarettes that don’t kill but instead grant all my wishes…I wanna be that girl that makes love to fajitas and quesadillas every night at 11:33 pm cause they seem so loving and would make extra good cuddlers and I really love how drippy they are…I wanna be that girl that eats styrofoam and then spits it all out to create a snowy snowfall that covers everything and makes everyone want to swim in hot chocolate with marshmallows and think dirty thoughts about Santa Clause, reindeers and elves…I wanna make a soft-core porn with Scooby Doo and the Gang incorporating lime green popsicles and cheerleader outfits with picnic baskets floating in the sky…. I wanna be that girl that loves me for me…no matter what will be…forever and ever until the sky falls down and eats the ground and the only thing left is a unicorn that blows bubble gum out of their bum bum…. xo

quite a long while ago… | 2 Comments

Looking for….

Dishwasher/housecleaner/life organizer that likes jerk chicken and doesn’t mind wearing jerk chicken perfume, must sing Give It To Me by Rick James while washing dishes, must incorporate the words cloud, unicorn, bacon, and love in almost every conversation… Must be open to occasional popcorn fights and hot tub parties…Should be good at building stuff  i.e. a tree house… Must like Pandas and be a really good hugger the kind of hugger that gives hugs so squishy that someones ends up peeing themselves… Must like fluorescent underwear and be able to lasso chickens and catch dandelion puffs with your lips…  Must also be able to communicate with squirrels… Can make home made vodka popsicles… Also must be amicable to the idea of tandem knitting, quilting or crocheting cocoons… Ideally you can morph into a wolf, tiger, or whale….

Compensation: I can pay you with marshmallows, necklaces, art, tequila, vodka, pickles, and if there’s chemistry massages and makeouts… oh yeah and face painting…

Page 30 of 82« First...1020...2829303132...405060...Last »