Things I’d rather do today…

Everything Random related to my Heart, Head and Art

Braid my hair … wet it in the ocean… dry it with fierce wind… unbraid it and then shake it a lot & make it really big and pretend I’m a dandelion puff….

Feed baby giraffes and make them caramel popcorn necklaces and crowns…

Make out under a waterfall with little itty bitty electric fish tickling my toes…

Eat glitter… then poo…. wait for poo to harden …make pooglitter disco balls…

Lie in bed and count my moles…

Draw hearts all over my body…

Try to figure out how to turn raindrops into ice cream drops…

Make the dopest piñata I’ve ever seen and fill it with bubble gum toothpaste….

Take all the shoelaces out of my shoes…

Duct Tape my legs into a mermaid tail….

Throw a bunch of smarties on the floor and eat them all up with no hands…

Figure out how to shoot stars out my mouth…

Hug myself forever and ever and ever and ever and ever…and ever…

The Diary of Me…

Story Time disclaimer: be open to weirdness

I live in a cardboard box with cake and candles glued all over it….My favorite things include… dancing on my tippy toes… kissing my hands… making wishes… and talking to my imaginary wolf….I can also fly anywhere I want and have a fancy knack for speaking with my eyes… I rarely say a word….

One day I decided to fly to the tip of the planet just so I could lick it…. then I made a cucumber sandwich tower…. nibbled on the top and then karate kicked the rest of it to the sky…. some birds caught the flying cucumber slices and dragged them home to make nests…. I am also very good with bunnies… they follow me everywhere and try to jump in my pockets and lick my toes….

Another day I decided to look for the largest piece of lettuce I could find and when I found it I wrapped myself tightly in it and had a nap…. then I climbed the tallest tree in the universe and practiced spitting so that when my spit landed on the ground it looked like a broken heart…. then I tanned by a volcano overflowing with lava..where I also teach a marshmallow roasting course to wogs and frogs and coyotes…

In the evening me and my  imaginary pet wolf went on a double date with a unicornwolf and a tigerbutterfly … we sipped champagne and blew bubbles at each other…we shared lobster and played with each others tails…. then we decided to go for a dip in the ocean where we held hands and stole kisses and pretended we were Patrick Swayze and Jennifer Grey in that scene in Dirty Dancing where they practice the running jump in the lake….

Later Later Later that evening after everyone was tucked in bed I snuck out of my box and flew to the brightest star…. I recited a poem to the star with my eyes that I wrote myself using pee and sparkles on a leaf…then we cuddled and snuggled and fell asleep in each others arms…. I stumbled home in the morning sleepy-eyed and dazed…. I cuddled up with my wolf and kissed my hands for a while and shut my eyes… and slept for 420 days….the end xo